Violet Sin’s Neighborhood

As the pipe clamp blisters began to pop and heal on my hands, I knew I was in a race against myself to find my next gig in woodworking. I had just quit my job after I was put on a mandatory 72-hour work week schedule, which was neither safe nor necessary in the warehouse where I was a full time furniture maker. From my first taste of sawdust, I was hooked. I loved everything about it, especially the aches & pains associated with putting in a hard day of manual labor.

I had moved thousands of miles from my industrial Michigan factory roots, only to go to college and decide the blue collar life is what I wanted. I quit my job, only when it was obvious that it would either kill or permanently injure me...but it was still one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make. Besides the fact that I love it, I realize now how wrapped up I was in the identity of being just one thing...In my working life, I have always had to have at least three side hustles going on and I've done everything from nude modeling, to being a maid, a well-paid executive assistant, an extra in movies, a make-up artist, to an apprentice sander in a woodshop.

When I call home to update my family, typically, whatever it is I describe is met with unconditional love & acceptance, even if there is a tinge of it not necessarily being understood. As a woodworker, I was finally able to align myself with an identity - one thing that I loved being and doing...and it was so much easier to explain that!

Predictably, when the job fell apart, I scrambled for any paying gig I could find on craigslist. As it turns out, it was a good time to be involved with film making and I even signed up for acting classes. Being involved in the process is as exciting as it seems like it would be - even the long hours of waiting, while being completely dressed to the nines for a 6:00 a.m. call time, shouldn't be exciting, but it still is.

Around this time I also found work as a fit model, working for a local design house. It's a job that pays very well but the work is inconsistent. Still, I am extremely thankful to have it, even if it is a bit weird for me to use it as an identifier at the dentist's office and have the receptionist squeal and ask me a bunch of questions about the job. That's a rock star moment, I'm not going to lie, but it's completely foreign to me to identify myself as "model" in any capacity...especially when "factory rat" was a closer signifier just weeks ago.

I'm not sure if all the discomfort in lacking a fixed occupation or identity squarely rests on my shoulders, or if I am reacting to other people's confusion when I try to explain, "Well, I'm actually a furniture maker, but I'm out of work, so I'm doing the acting and modeling thing, while looking for another woodworking gig." Who does that? I'm not sure if I even understand myself anymore.

In the long run, it's probably a good thing that I am so versatile & adaptable - I always have something relevent for any type of resume I'm creating for myself (and I have at least 3); but I long for the day when I have a short answer to the question, "So what do you do?" 

Of course I'm thankful for family and friends but God's mercy and grace are freshest in my mind. Without knowing God I would almost certainly still be lost, guilty, ashamed, and self centered. So today I'd say that I am most thankful for the painful course of events that put me on my knees - a necessary and life saving humbling no doubt. This is my first Turkey day as a believer and it rocks!
-Thanks, Jon Marler (via BlackBerry)

My first job was working as a make-up artist in my mom's cosmetic shop, which was located in "the dead mall" across the street from the mega-mall, where everyone respectable went to shop. The only folks who ventured into the dead mall were those with bizarre fetishes they wanted to try out in "public" without actually being too far out into the public sphere. My four hour shift was often punctuated with high school principals and construction workers in drag, trying out the new high heels they just scored at Payless; a 60 yr. old woman dressed as a naughty school girl being led around on a leash by her husband; your occasional flasher; foot fetish guy who would creepily make me show him the colors of "toenail" polish we carried and on & on...

Anyway, it appears that Vox is now the dead mall. Of course, I'm sure there are still many "respectable" folks on here...but more so, there are a lot just letting their freak flag fly. And I love it. You are my people and I'm happy to be back. But don't send me pictures of your penis. Thanks.

Hello Members of Girl Germs,

I am very sorry that I went MIA for so long and spammers have been allowed to contaminate this space. I'm back now and ready to lay the smack down. I nuked as many spam posts as I could find and members that are clearly robots...but I'm sure I didn't catch everything. If you see something that should be destroyed, please let me know so that I can take care of it.

Thank you so much for adding all this wonderful content to the group - I have enjoyed catching up with everything I missed and have learned a lot. Also, you have inspired me so much! I can't wait to start writing again!

xoxo,

Miss Scotch

Hawaii

Australia

Thailand

Vietnam

Finances are about to get very interesting - with only one more month of certain employment left, a move to Hawaii, and two major world trips on the books for the second half of 2009...paying off my student loans may have to take a backseat to big fun and big adventure. If I were to continue at the current rate, I would be finished with them in five months...

But I am now planning a trip to Thailand with my best friend in November, to celebrate our joint 30th birthdays. The ticket from Honolulu to Bangkok is $784, but that's the biggest expense - I'm sure it will be cheap once we are there. We still have to sort out the details, but it's looking like it will be a two week adventure from November 12 - 26...she will fly from Cairo to Bangkok to meet me. With two weeks to kill, I would like to take a train to Phuket and another to Cambodia to visit Angkor Wat. I can't think of a better way for us to celebrate this milestone, than to meet half way, on the other side of the world, for a grand adventure. 

The second big trip will take place over New Year's Eve. Steve & I have our eyes on either Australia (for the Falls Festival) or a trip to Vietnam, where we would buy scooters and drive them up the coast from Ho Chi Minh to Ha Noi...I'm kinda leaning toward Vietnam...but I will gladly do either.

As for the loans...I have managed to really kick them in the pants this year, it's possible they may have to wait while I have a little fun!

My landlord
failed to show for the possessory hearing.  I was so ready to pounce for the failure to accept payment from a charity.  I showed up early to see how the evictions were going.  Interesting to say the least.

One defendant
was being sued by a dental place.  The plaintiff was represented by an attorney.  The plaintiff's attorney questions the pro-se defendant and said his dentist office was supposed to apply a discount and didn't.  No proof was provided by either side.  The judge started to say I order for the defendant but the plaintiff's attorney interrupted and asked to be sworn in for testimony on some conversation ... she told him unless it has something to do with fact besides you collecting fees then, 'no you may not be sworn in.'  The plaintiff's claim was for $38 - denied.  Obviously this attorney did not represent his client well - and sacrificed one case for not upsetting the judge on the other 17 cases she heard from him in 10 minutes.  Plaintiffs won every case today except this one - and the ones where the plaintiff didn't show. So awesome to see common sense prevail.

You know,

On the job front,
the whole over qualified thing is getting very old and very frustraing.  I cant get a minimum wage job because of my resume and former salary.  I'm serious - 6, count 'em 6 different employers have told me no - not because they don't have openings but because they are afraid that I'd leave once the market opens up again.

For the first time
in my life I've had to accept charity assistance.  Well actually its the first time I've needed it.  Community Action Program-CAP (aka the Energy Assistance Office) paid my electric bill on Friday and gave me a $25 gift card for a local grocery store.  When they called Duke Energy to tell them that they would be paying my bill, Duke informed them that they had me on the disconnect schedule for today (last Friday).  After they were on hold for a bit trying to stop the disconnect they came back on and they said the truck was at my apartment but they stopped it in time.  Whew...

Then they offerred
to pay my rent. Would you believe that my landlord refused, Stafford Pointe Apartments in Plainfield, IN (Greed Central) is refusing full payment. They refused it last Friday because it was for $139 less than what I owed.  The manager told me that they needed a money order for the $139 and then they would accept the charity's payment so I got a family loan for that on Sunday. I dropped off the charity form and my $139 money order late last night. Today when I called them to confirm everything was ok so they could drop the eviction suit... 

Yep they are refusing
because signing the form means they are accepting a 'voucher' for about 4 days until the check arrives.  This charity says these vouchers are processed the same day - the 4 days is for US mail.  The thing is that court hearing isn't until April 6th...

I knew that they
were a little on the greedy side when they sued me in January. Rent is due on the 5th and if they don't have it on the 16th the sue. I settled that one by selling my car for rent money. My dad loaned me money to buy another vehicle since then.

Sooo, I'm at a decision
point. No other landlords will take me - even if I had steady income because I have an eviction on my credit and these guys seems hell bent on throwing me out - even after being presented with full payment including court costs and late fees. My adopted mom and biological mom have both offerred to put me up. Besides the inherent turmoil in having to make that choice I also have to contend with leaving Circle Face for an extended period of time as both mom's live 4 - 6 hours away drive time. I'm leaning strongly against taking my moms up on their respective offers and will most likely move into a homeless shelter or live in my car for as long as I can.

With a shelter or living
in my car I would not be able to have Circle Face stay over night but at least I could still see her weekly. That is something that I just can't get around. I think it is better to be homeless than to miss time with my daughter.  The time less about me missing her but more about her needing her dad on a regular basis.

This whole situation
is paralyzing. Do I sit here and cry, do I spend the $139 (if I can get a refund on the money order) for gasoline in order to go job hunting throughout the city ... do I move to Tennesee or Kentucky and leave my daughter behind for a few weeks/months (who really knows)?